The Clare Burren Half Marathon is almost here... At 7am tomorrow morning while you are sleeping tight in your bed I'll be making my way down to Ballyvaughan to run my first Half Marathon. I can't believe I am saying those words:
Two words which I have used many times seperately in my life before but in a complete different context. For example:
"I'm going to fanny on the couch all weekend and have a Greys Anatomy marathon"
"Half Portion? Do I look like I'm 4. I want the Works!"
"Why did they rename Marathon to Snickers? Ooh I'd love a Snickers"
"I'll have half Caramel Chew Chew, half Cookie Dough"
I am nervous but it's excited nerves for tomorrow. I am going to partake in something I never ever thought I would be able to do. It's not that I had told myself "You CAN'T do it!" more that it had never even crossed my mind as a possibility. Now I know it's possible - I'm excited to see how I get on. I don't really care if I have to crawl across the finish line - or if I cross it at the 3:00 hour mark - I'll still have taken part in my first ever Half Marathon.
I plan on keeping myself motivated throughout the race by holding this picture in my mind:
That's over 6 stone... 84 lbs... Or if I break it down, it'll be 1 lb for every 250m I will run tomorrow. I've said before I've always seen my weight-loss as a series of smaller goals, and while the big picture has always been at the back of my mind, I don't know if I even believed in my own determination and myself to get there. I see my weight-loss journey as a staircase so only ever really look at the next few steps on the stairs instead of taking time to look back at how far I've come.
In the 9 months since I started on my journey I have changed so much. Of course I am the same person on the inside but with added improvements. I am a much more positive person with a healthy lifestyle (*cough*If-you-ignore-the-smoking-part*cough*) and have a healthy attitude about my own future, weight, health and lifestyle. I am not living in ignorance anymore and I know that I am in control of my food choices (good or bad) - what I eat has always been a choice.
I have also found something I love in running. I have found something I think I am good at. Now while I know I will never set a new World Record for running the fastest 5K or anything, I know I will continue to get better and enjoy the journey on the way.
This is what will keep me going tomorrow. My playlist tomorrow won't come from Britney or whoever is pumping into my ears, it'll come from within myself. I'm running this for everyone who has supported and helped me along the way. My family, my friends and the people I know from Twitter/online but not in real life. From the words of encouragement I've gotten on Twitter/Facebook to the compliments I've received to the deep & meaningful conversations I've had with my brilliant friends - I am extremely grateful. The support I have gotten has been such a fantastic pool for me to pull motivation from when I have seen a dip in my own personal drive.
There is however only one person without whose incredible support I wouldn't be where I am today - and that's my other half. He has been there for the past 9 years, through my previous weight-battles, my ups and downs in weight. He was there for me when I came home from my first WW meeting completely in shock at the fact I weighed 19st 2lbs. He was there when I rejoined WW for a few weeks back in 2010. He has never once laughed or snigger at me or fuelled any doubt-sparks that I sometimes spout out. He has done nothing but encourage, champion and support me.
For this reason, the second track on my motivation playlist tomorrow will be for him. He is an incredible person - anyone who knows me (or him) cannot deny what a caring, thoughtful, compassionate and friendly guy he is. Knowing he will be waiting for me at the finish line tomorrow (as he has been at every race I have run to date) cheering me on is what will get me over the finish line.
For C (Image from Exploding Dog - link here)
Anyway, that's enough of my ramblings for now. I'm off to work and afterwards will enjoy my 'Rest Day' making sure I get plenty of carbs in for dinner tonight. I'm looking forward to getting a good nights sleep and I'll talk to ye on the other side.